Hey there friend! So my 20s are coming to an end. My birthday is this week… on Saturday, July 20th I officially turn the big 3-0!
My friends are asking me if I’m “ready” or “dreading” it…
To be honest—I’m STOKED!
I have always felt like an older person trapped in a younger person’s body. Since childhood, I never felt I fit in with my peers and always gravitated to an older crowd.
Even now, I typically prefer engaging with people 10+ years older than myself and struggle to connect with people my age (although I’m always looking for friends so holla at me if you’re also a loner!).
When I started on YouTube about 5 years ago, everyone thought I was at least 10 years older than I am. I used to feel anxious about this in my 20s because I thought they meant I looked old, but I’ve come to realize it’s more likely related to the way I carry myself.
When I was 25, people were thinking I was 40. This makes me hopeful that in my 30s I’ll start to “level out.” Maybe I’ll get my grandma’s good genes and when I’m actually old people will finally for the first time in my life think I’m younger than I am! (hehe).
But seriously, I’m totally okay with turning 30.
Yeah, the 20s decade coming to an end is a little… strange… but I think it’s all for the best. I don’t know anyone who’s 35+ that really misses their 20s (unless they were that person who loved high school and college so much and then did nothing with their lives).
When I started my 20s I was (like many people) a terrified perfectionist worried about success and pleasing my parents.
I was angry and frustrated with a lot of pain built up and unresolved. I had no tools to help deal with my emotions and didn’t know how to do anything with them other than numb and avoid. Wow—what a decade and journey it’s been to go from there to where I am now. I thought I’d shared some of my experience…
Here are a 20 lessons I learned in my 20s:
Perfection is not real.
No human will love you like your dog does (can’t believe it took me this long to realize but I never had a dog growing up).
Food is medicine—for the mind and the body.
We don’t usually have as much to “lose” as we think we do.
No one else can be responsible for how we feel. Taking responsibility is freedom.
You can’t plan everything, and if you try to you’ll miss out on experiencing everything you worked so hard to plan in the first place.
The universe will always test you when you when it feels like the most inconvenient time.
We are human BE-ings, not human DO-ings.
Most people are doing the best they can with what they have.
Someone will always have something to say; you can’t please everyone—so don’t try to.
Being controversial isn’t always a bad thing. Having everyone like you isn’t always a good thing.
Every human needs some kind of therapy.
There will never be a perfect time to do something. It will NEVER all align, so stop waiting and learn to work with what you’ve got.
People who are mean/negative/angry are in pain.
Most pain is self-imposed. We are our own worst enemy; no one doubts or judges us more than ourselves.
When we’re quiet we can hear more.
“If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present.” ― Lao Tzu
You can’t do anyone else’s personal work for them. In fact, if you’re trying, you’re probably avoiding your own personal work.
We have everything we need inside of us already.
Resistance is futile; reality rules.
And so many more. It was a good decade… but in my 20s I also learned to trust that it’s this, or better.
Everything I’ve learned and that I hear gives me hope that 30s will be the BEST!
I’m doing some intention setting and really want to just go into this next decade LOVING life, loving myself, and learning from as many people as I can. I can’t wait to see where I’ll be 10 years from now!
I feel so grateful for my journey so far, and I feel excited for what’s to come!
Reading your responses fills me up and keeps me going. You teach me about myself, humanity, connection and life—you inspire me to want to connect with more humans instead of hiding away like I did for so long.
Thank you for showing me how beautiful humans are! Your light is radiant!